So, I've been single for about 6 days now and I have to say it's quite liberating. In order to prevent myself from doing any further harm I've decided to ground myself from love relationships and to live an exciting single life for a while. I really have no idea what I'm doing but that is what will most likely lead to your entertainment.
For the past week I've been tossing around a few ideas with co-workers on how to steer clear of the opposite sex for a while. I pitched the clever idea that not shaving my legs might work and then someone else chimed in that if I decide to go that route then I ought to go the extra mile and include my arm pits, thus causing me to mentally scratch that idea all together immediately!
I've also taken note that the best time NOT to go grocery shopping if trying to stay single would be anytime after 9pm Monday through Thursday. These nights specifically, you will see a handful of single guys in there shopping due to their busy weekends and other than that the store will be dead. I did notice that it felt a little awkward in there when the fourth romantic duet song came on. Especially post break up the last thing you want to hear is Linda Ronstadt and Aaron Neville singing about how they don't know much except that they love each other and apparently that's all they need to know. It almost felt like someone was trying to stage one of those superficial meetings, you know the ones where you meet the love of your life conveniently standing in the produce section as you both reach for the same apple.
Don't worry though, Even though I was the only female in there I made sure to make minimal eye contact when walking past these gents. See no evil, Hear no evil .... Date no evil? Sounds good to me!
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